Friday, October 10, 2008
The Biter
So, some of you may remember my fretting about Andrew's biting and whether it would get him into trouble at daycare. Well, we have not had any problems with Andrew biting anyone (except me occasionally), but, Andrew has been getting bitten. It started with a huge bite on his arm all the teeth of the little child were imprinted on his arm and a bruise surfaced a day later. The daycare was aware and knew which child was the culprit we were sure that it wouldn't happen again. Then he was bit again and yet again! I truly do think that the daycare workers were doing their best, but seeing that this little biter was in the same age group as Andrew they usually played together and it was difficult to get the child to stay away from Andrew. So, the daycare followed their policy and held a conference with the parents. Then Andrew was bit again so, the daycare suspended the biter for two days. After day one of suspension mom of the biter comes waltzing in to daycare and begins yelling about how she'll lose her job and she can't stay home and this isn't teaching her child to not bite (which I did feel sorry for her, I mean what do you do?). Well, our daycare held firm to its policy and the mom said fine I'm finding another daycare! So, Andrew is no longer getting bit, which is a big relief, but how ironic considering I've been the one worried about getting kicked from daycare for biting!
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6 comments:
That is such an interesting dilemma. What do you do?... Obviously, you don't want your child to get bitten, but teeth are so new to these little kids and they are experimenting with them. I don't know what we would do in a similar situation. I hope it worked out/will work out well for everyone.
Every time Rowan gets new teeth (we're up to 4), she goes through a period where she bites me while she nurses (and that hurts!) We always have to relearn what "no biting" means. Mike said she bit him the other day too. I imagine we have months of this ahead of us. I like reading your updates on Andrew so we know what the future holds.
Chenoa- Well, I think that there is a difference in biting because of teething (Rowan) and biting out of anger or frustration (the child at daycare). This child had all their teeth and was biting when frustrated, such as when Andrew would take a toy away. This is the type of biting that can be very hard to break I think. If they are biting because their little mouths hurt then when the teeth stop coming I think the biting will stop.
The dilemma with Andrew is that he is definitely teething right now, but he has also begun to show signs of little tantrums, so I'm not certain when he tries to bite me what the motivation is. I just started reading a book on preventing toddlers tantrums, so we'll see if it works. I'll let you know!
preventing temper tantrums or dealing with them? Good luck with that one! :) Shelby got bit almost everyday for 2 months and the perpetrator (good friends of ours) bit out of affection if you can believe that!!!!
Beth-
Awwww poor Shelby. The motivation was affection? That one is new to me. The book I'm reading tries to prevent tantrums from continuing to escalate and stop them in their tracks as soon as the child becomes unruly. I tried the method last night with Andrew and he laughed every time I did it, so it stopped him from screaming, maybe it will work?
Rowan bit a little girl on the head at our LLL meeting last night. She was doing it out of curi/
/ousity (I think) for the little g/irl's hair. Any ideas at this age how to get it to stop (other than picking her up and taking her away--which I did)?
Rowan was helping me type(to explain tweird lETTERS h)
Chenoa- Not that I am any kind of expert, but in my experience at Rowan's age the suggested methods would probably be similar to what I was told when Andrew was biting me while bf. These are what I was told, pop them on the mouth lightly and say "NO BITE," loudly say "NO BITE" to startle them (this made Andrew cry), or bite them back (I never did this, but many people swear by it). In general at her age it sounds like you really did what could, which is remove her from the situation or distract her. I find distraction continues to be key in resolving bad/inappropriate behavior.
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